Blood Diner Review
This has everything a sick individual like me needs. Sick and twisted humor, characters, plot and everything else. It's all simply perverse and nuts. The main characters are two brothers who revive their long dead uncle's brain. It's kept in a jar and it even has eyes. Their objective is to raise the goddess Sheetar from the dead with instructions by their uncle. Michael is the smarter brother and has hypnosis abilities and George is very stupid. Together they will provide us with some very cool kills.
You have to love a movie where someone kills a bunch of topless cheerleaders with a tommy gun. But why does that happen you ask? Well Michael and George need to make a body for Sheetar but also get some supplies for their Tutman cafe. A vegetarian restaurant! And everyone just loves their secret ingredient. Guess what that is? Certainly not chili. Their most royal customer is the fat mr. Vitamin who unlike George, hates wrestling. Interesting scene where Vitamin is vomiting all over the place. Makes no sense. It's disgusting. I love it. More on the wrestling. George is very annoyed with Little Jimmy Hitler (the name!!!) and decides to challenge him. This is a very emotional fight but George wins and bites some skin off Hitler's leg. Astounding. I liked George much better since he does all the brainless things. Like throwing a guy whose head then gets ran over by a car with hydraulics. Best thing here, the guys friend asks if he's okay. Hilarious. Here are some other accomplishments by George:
1. When a restaurant inspector comes to check things out, George bakes his freshly cut off fingers and serves them to hungry guests.
2. He can win in wrestling but get's his ass kicked by a defenseless nude woman.
3. He needs to run over a fat biker with his truck at least 20 times to kill him.
That doesn't mean Michael disappoints. He manages to put a woman's head in a deep fryer which then comes out as a big potato. Naturally she's still alive and running around like a crazy chicken, so Michael must slice of the head with a broom. Great scene. He also has some really bad clothing ideas.
The cops are also great. A female Janet Jackson look-a-like, a perverse young detective Mark and the chief who has high moral values. And the chief sometimes has a need to try out his fist on Mark.
Stan, a greedy owner of an empty cafe is a great character. He has a talking puppet that's not as great as in Monsturd but very awesome in it's own way. Now this guy does a very stupid thing by capturing the brain in order to find out the secret recipe. The brothers send him off in his car with both hands chopped off. Interesting how he feels no pain. Anyway download the clip and see for yourself.
Blood diner is a damn fine extravaganza of sick jokes and crazy gore. If you can somehow get your hands on it please do. Should not be missed by anyone who liked Brain Dead, Bad Taste or twisted movies in general. Somehow short review but I just can't find enough words for this masterpiece. Let's have some meat!
