#1 |
Steven Seagal eats 5 trucks of food a day. |
#2 |
Special chairs were made to fit Steven Seagal's ass. |
#3 |
Steven Seagal has his own harem. |
#4 |
Steven Seagal doesn't have favorite food. He eats everything. |
#5 |
Steven Seagal only sleeps when having sex. |
#6 |
Steven Seagal is an undefeated champion of the world pie eating competition. His record is eating 500 pies in one hour. |
#7 |
Steven Seagal's penis knows aikido, but can't have an erection. |
#8 |
Steven Seagal can meditate and eat in the same time. |
#9 |
If a diet was a person, Steven Seagal would kill it. |
#10 |
Steven Seagal wanted to be a stunt double for King Kong but was rejected for being too fat. |
#11 |
While Steven Seagal was in Thailand he learned to eat and shit while levitating. |
#12 |
Steven Seagal's belly can repent cannon balls. |
#13 |
Once there used to be pie in this world, but then Steven Seagal came along. |
#14 |
If there are left-overs after he eats, Steven Seagal doesn't throw them, he eats them. |
#15 |
Steven Seagal looks mad, always, because he got his ass spanked by Steven Hawking. |
#16 |
When someone eats a hamburger, Steven Seagal eats two. |
#17 |
Steven Seagal is actually the owner of all fast food restaurants across the world. |
#18 |
Steven Seagal doesn't have a mood when he eats the most. He always eats the most. |
#19 |
A woman once tried to make fun of Steven Seagal's weight in bed. She now has 20 children that are fat and know aikido. |
#20 |
The only thing scarier than Steven Seagal without Botox is Steven Seagal WITH a record deal. |
#21 |
While in Tibet, Steven Seagal learned how to kill a man with such devices as a remote control and a bologne sandwich. |
